10 Crazy Hilarious Amazon Product Reviews

10. The Wolf of Wall Street

“There were no wolves in the movie” – Joe Watson

9. The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee

“I had a two-wolf shirt for a while and I didn’t think life could get any better. I was wrong. Life got 50% better, no lie.” – Seth G. Macy

8. Denon AKDL1 Dedicated Link Cable

“The most horrific thing of all was that after having spent 300 years crawling to the system to unplug said cable, my brother was unable to control the sheer power of such a quality signal and like an ancient psychedelic Mr Miyagi struggling with a running fire hose, pointed the beam directly into his face.”

I purchased this mane-ly for anonymity, but instead it was a night-mare that saddled me with un-bridled panic.” – Deviant

7. Accoutrements Horse Head Mask

“At a recent Comic Con, I donned the mask wearing my best track suit, jockeying for a simple laugh: “What do gay horses eat?” I queried, eager to bray “Heeeeeyyyy!!” Comic gold, friends, I know.

But the neigh-sayers came unglued. “No! You’re George Takei! I know that voice!”

Now, it doesn’t take a gallop poll to know what happened next. I hoofed it out of there with herds of fans riding my ass, shouting till they, too, were…horse.” – George Takei

6. Wenger 16999 Swiss Army Knife Giant

“When I forgot to take it out of my backpack before trying to board my flight the helpful TSA agent at the security area pointed out that by deploying the two larger blades and the jet engine on the back side I really didn’t need a commercial flight, just a runway and some goggles. Boy, did I feel dumb, but I saved $605 on airfare!” – B.W. Behling

5. UFO-02 Detector

“We again found no signs of aliens in the morning. My uncle and I noticed that some of his cattle had fallen over and accidentally disemboweled themselves, which my uncle was upset about. But we could see no signs of aliens.” – Joseph K

4. JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank

“Now that my wife has kicked me out of the house and I’m living in my tank, I have really noticed the need for more ventilation. I haven’t showered in six months and it is pretty ripe smelling in there.” – Ron Dansley

3. The Daddle

“Should not be sold without severe warning. After a long day of being ridden by my children, I was grazing on some nearby greens when my daughter dropped a dish on the ground. It broke and the noise of it spooked me, causing me to rear back and kick my son in the head…” -Patrick

2. White Face Paint by Amscam

“I purchased this for an African-American friend of mine in New York who frequently has trouble hailing a cab. Well, he used this face paint and now cabs are picking him up, the hostess at Denny’s actually seated him, and he hasn’t been ‘stopped and frisked’ by the NYPD since!” – S. Archer

1. BIC For Her Medium Ballpoint Pen

“My husband has never allowed me to write, as he doesn’t want me touching mens pens. However when I saw this product, I decided to buy it (using my pocket money) and so far it has been fabulous! Once I had learnt to write, the feminine colour and the grip size (which was more suited to my delicate little hands) has enabled me to vent thoughts about new recipe ideas, sewing and gardening. My husband is less pleased with this product as he believes it will lead to more independence and he hates the feminine tingling sensation (along with the visions of fairies and rainbows) he gets whenever he picks it up.” – A Keen Skier

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